Daylight (A Personal Note on Winter)

Cracked Mirror in Shalott

I am multiply disabled. I’m even disabled neurologically in more than one way. I am an Autistic with anxiety and depression, cataplexy (possibly narcolepsy going by family history), learning disabilities, and a tendency toward agoraphobic episodes. For some reason, those interact to my least benefit during the winter months.

First, I become anxious and distracted. My anxiety starts making acting on my knowledge instead of my anxiety difficult in November. I begin to worry about things that I am otherwise never in doubt of. I try to fight my anxiety, but this sometimes means I say or do things that make people feel blamed or sad. But I don’t have a strong enough filter at this point to turn it off.

By the end of December I’m depressed, isolated, and feeling as though I am not doing well at non-“work” related interactions. Sometimes circumstances make this more intense. I have family members who too often do…

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Published by Autism Candles

My name is Nathan Young. I'm the founder of the Autism Candles project. I am a self-advocate. The candle project exist to make a statement about inclusion and opportunity. My email is nathan@autismcandles.com. Feel free to contact me. https://www.autismcandles.com

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