Débora Ewing, My Real Face


I’m one of a growing number of adults who finds herself somewhere on the autism spectrum. The diagnosis did not exist in the 70s when I was evaluated several times and found to be other things – fanciful, precocious, talkative, disorganized. I tried therapy more than once, only to be sent home as normal, which I now take to mean functional, undiagnosable. The autism spectrum puts what others call my eccentricities into a context within which I can better manage society. There is no prescription. Knowing I was never wrong about myself has been the best medicine.

my real face

mania clears
and I sweep up the shards
dreams not ill-pursued
but stunted
life-cycles will be what they will

all those times I almost didn’t go
I hold them lovingly;
would have been easier

I make my own coffee again
look — I’ve been cut
this hematopoietic slow…

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Published by Autism Candles

My name is Nathan Young. I'm the founder of the Autism Candles project. I am a self-advocate. The candle project exist to make a statement about inclusion and opportunity. My email is nathan@autismcandles.com. Feel free to contact me. https://www.autismcandles.com


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